I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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