I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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