just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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