me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
