I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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