billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize