What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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