Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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