What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I think my vagina is haunted
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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