I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize
