Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
