butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
