i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize