zippers are such a cool invention
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
