I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
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