HIV tests are more positive than that guy
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize