based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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