There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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