I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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