I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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