Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
