Jerry, you need to find god
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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