Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
