these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
