A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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