I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
