You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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