I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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