are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
