if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
