First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
