U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
