No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize