sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize