oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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