so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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