He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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