This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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