Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
