normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize