that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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