You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
