Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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