I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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