Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
