I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
she looked like the before picture.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
