Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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