Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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