She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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