You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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