BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
