All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
