I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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