well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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